Wilderness and Crossroad
Past two months have been tough. I have to make some changes to settle something that is still lingering around me. It is my ignorance that now I am facing my consequences. The questions that I am asking? What I should do?
The Lord seems to be quiet and allowing me to make the decision. More like a test? To who I will be true too? Which master I will serve? I am overwhelmed by this situation and feel like running away to an unknown place.
Thank God for some good people that I can process with some of the situation I am facing. I wish these season will end soon. It is too dry and long.
Today while I was reading John 7, one of the verse pop up to my attention that actually reminds me of human nature after the fall.
17 If anyone wants to do his will, he will know about my* teaching, whether it is from God or I am speaking from myself. 18 The one who speaks from himself seeks his own glory. But the one who seeks the glory of the one who sent him—this one is true, and there is no unrighteousness in him
Harris, W. H., III, Ritzema, E., Brannan, R., Mangum, D., Dunham, J., Reimer, J. A., & Wierenga, M. (Eds.). (2012). The Lexham English Bible (Jn 7:17–18). Bellingham, WA: Lexham Press.
Guilty of charge!! I seek my own glory, I want to prove myself, I want to be noticed and I want to do it my way.
I wonder why? The Pharisees were in the same shoe and Jesus rebuked them. Now me! How will I come out of this situation?
The dependence from I to "I AM" has to happen.
This crisis seems to be happening to me every year, I cannot break free to be totally dependent on "I AM"
Something is missing in the puzzle that enables me to connect to the truth that will set me free.
I need your assistance, I am not able to foresee the things that will take place in future if I continue in such manner. Open my eyes to see! Reveal my condition and I will change to bring glory to you! Sorry, Lord, I am trying to bring glory to my own. It is not my doing it is yours that I am who I am today. I recognize it.